I AM A SLAVE

It was like any other weekday morning, we all loaded up into car and I headed off to drop my three boys off at school. I don't know if they ever remembered a time when we didn't listen to one of my favorite pastors on the radio as we drove to school each morning. They just always knew that the radio dial was off limits in the morning.

As we all climbed in at 8am and backed out of the driveway we found out the topic of the series of the week, "Marriage, Divorce & Remarriage." This morning sermon began in the book of Hosea. Hosea wasn't an Old Testament book that I knew very much about nor did I ever really hear anyone preach out of this Old Testament book. It instantly captured my interested to hear about Hosea and how this related to marriage, divorce & remarriage.

Hosea was a prophet. Hosea's ministry was from 755 - 710 B.C. His career spanned the last 6 kings of Israel. God called Hosea to marry Gomer.

"When the Lord first spoke through Hosea, the Lord said to Hosea, 'Go, take to yourself a wife of harlotry and have children of harlotry;.....So he went and took Gomer the daughter of Diblaim, and she conceived and bore him a son. And the Lord said to him, "Name him Jezreel;

(Hosea 1: 2-4)

Then she conceived again and gave birth to a daughter. And the Lord said to him, Name Her Lo-ruhamah, for I will no longer have compassion on the house of Israel, that I would ever forgive them. But I will have compassion on the house of Judah and deliver them by the Lord their God, and will not deliver them by bow, sword, battle, horses or horsemen." When she weaned Lo-ruhamah, she conceived and gave birth to a son. And the Lord said, 'Name him Loammi, for you are not my people and I am not your God." (Hosea 1:6-9)

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. God had called this prophet to marry a woman who God knew and foretold possibly to Hosea that she would be an adulteress and not be faithful to him. In either case, Hosea obeyed his God unselfishly without complaint knowing the outcome that awaited him. Gomer left her husband and family and pursued her desires and idols that ruled her heart. She pursued what she believed would satisfy her. We don't know how Gomer got to to this point in detail but I am sure of this, in the beginnings of her pursuits I am sure she never thought she'd end up at a slave auction.

God calls Hosea to pursue his estranged wife and buy her back for 15 shekels of silver and 1 1/2 homers of barley. The total may have equaled 30 pieces of silver which what was the price paid for a common slave.

I thought about several people who I wish could hear this message about forgiveness to repair their marriages. I thought about a couple of ladies I knew at church who were struggling with husband who had committed adultery. I thought of a good friend who left her husband and children to live out her desires ....if only her husband could love her like Hosea did and forgive her and take her back.

I dropped the boys off and said my goodbyes. As I drove back home and I began to process what I was hearing. It hit me and it hit me hard. I made a sharp right turn and it came to me as if someone had just flipped a switch and a light turned on!

This story wasn't only about marriage, remarriage and divorce or was it also about how God loved and pursued an idolatrous Israel....this was about ME! Yes! It's about me and what Christ did for ME! It all makes sense now.....

Before I was a Christian I was a slave....a slave to my sin and my desires. I was just like the adulterous Israel and Gomer,pursing the idols of my heart. When I came to my end with nothing to bring or offer, Christ bought me back. He didn't buy me with silver shekels. Christ bought me back with His blood. He sacrificed His life for ME! He obeyed God to the point of death for His beloved, because of His love for ME! God gave us the beautiful picture of unconditional love of Hosea to Gomer....sacrificial and selfless .... to point us the the ultimate selfless love & sacrifice of His son, Jesus.

"But thanks be to God that though you were slaves to sin, you became obedient from the heart to that form of teaching to which you were committed, and having been freed from sin, you became slaves of righteousness."

Romans 7: 17-18

"For when you were slaves to sin, you were free in regard to righteousness. Therefore what benefit were you then deriving from the things of which you are now ashamed. For the outcome of those things is death. But now having been freed from sin and enslaved to God, you derive your benefit, resulting in sanctification, and the outcome, eternal life. For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord."

Romans 7:20-23

I cannot look at this portrait without thinking of Gomer. What was she thinking when she stood there being sold as a slave. Her pursuits and desires lead her to this place. Gomer believed the lie that we all believed when we allowed the lies of this world to skew our vision of the truth. When we believe fulfilling our fleshly desires will satisfy us but we wake up continually empty. When we think this place, person or thing will fulfill us ....I just want to try one more time.

I was created for my Groom and He and only He is the only one that can satisfy my soul.

Relationships - Live With Them or Without Them?

There is a saying, "Can't live with them and you can't live without them." Men & Women can say this about each other can't they? In reality, we can easily say that about all relationships. As I walk in faith God is continually showing me the idols of my heart.
I am an only child and from a young age relationship/friendships have always been very important to me. I vividly remember as a young girl that I would put friends first before anything else in my life.
When relationships are good and enjoyable we can say, "can't live without them!" But when they are not going so good is when we say, "can't live with them!" I began reading Paul David Tripp's book, "Relationship - A Mess Worth Making", several weeks ago when I could easily say that I could live with them. As I began reading God was faithful to stir my pot of life and my relationships to show me where my relationships were in the priority list of life. I'm pretty sure we can all say that in all our relationships we will have some degree of disappointments. Tripp writes, " It is clear to you that no relationship ever delivers what you dreamt it could. Your fantasy collides with reality, and reality bites!" Tripp takes the old cliche' and says it this way, "Some of our deepest and most painful hurts have been in relationships. There are times when we wish we could live alone and other times when we are glad we don't."

What I am learning is that I put too much stock in my earthly relationships to dictate my daily emotions or temperature of my attitude. Tripp says, "in the messiness of relationships is that our hearts are revealed, our weaknesses are exposed, and we start coming to the end of ourselves. Only when this happens do we reach out for the help God alone can provide. Weak and needy people finding their hope in Christ's grace are what mark a mature relationship." Tripp continues with, "the very thing we would naturally seek to avoid is what God has chosen to use to make us more like HIM."

This is the part of the book that hit me to the core....

"Each of us is tempted to make relationships the end rather than the means. The primary relationship Adam and Eve were intended to enjoy was their relationship with God. This vertical communion with God would provide the foundation for the horizontal community they were to have with each other. Everything God made pointed Adam and Eve to the primacy of their relationship with Him. All of creation was to function as an arrow pointing to God. But in our sin we tend to treat people and creation as more important. The very things God created to reveal His glory become instead the glory we desire. This is where we see, with C.S. Lewis, that our desires are too weak, not too strong. We settle for the relationships when they were meant to point us to the perfect relational satisfaction found only with God. The irony is that when we reverse the order and elevate creation above Creator, we destroy the relationships God intended - and would have enabled - us to enjoy."

A few years back I renewed my purpose and told God that He was enough. Since than He has been faithful and merciful with me to use the circumstances in my life to show me and purify me so that I can truthfully and honestly say with a pure heart say, "Lord you are enough!"

I know the Psalmist who wrote Psalm 73 knew exactly what I meant and felt...

Psalm 73: 25-26

"Whom have I in heaven but You? And besides You, I desire nothing on earth. My flesh and my heart may fail, But God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.

Are your relationships there to serve you? Or to serve HIM? May we all be able to say like the Psalmist, "besides GOD, I desire nothing on earth."

Which Thief Are You?

The last few days I've been reflecting on the words that Jesus spoke just before he died, "It is Finished!" In that reflection I realize and came across the conversation with the two thieves that are being crucified with Him.
Luke 23: 33-43
"When they came to the place called The Skull, there they crucified Him and the criminals, one on the right and the other on the left. But Jesus was saying, 'Father, forgive them; for they don not know what they are doing.' And they cast lots, dividing up His garments among themselves. And the people stood by, looking on. And even the rulers were sneering at Him, saying, 'He saved others; let Him save Himself if this is the Christ of God, His Chosen One.' The soldiers also mocked Him, coming up to Him, offering Him sour wine, and saying, 'If You are the King of the Jews, save Yourself!' Now there was also an inscription above Him, "This IS THE KING OF THE JEWS."
One of the criminals who were hanged there was hurling abuse at Him, saying, 'Are you not the Christ? Save yourself and us!' But the other answered, and rebuking him said, 'Do you not even fear God, since you are under the same sentence of condemnation? And we indeed are suffering justly, for we are receiving what we deserve for our deeds; but this man has done nothing wrong.' And he was saying, 'Jesus, remember me when You come in Your kingdom!' And He said to him, 'Truly I say to you, today you shall be with Me in Paradise.'"

I don't know exactly when or how but the older I get I realize how much less its me in my faith and more God. I realize how much of a sinner I am and how much I don't deserve the gift of salvation which drives me to my knees in humility and make me thank God for the price He paid on the cross for my sins so that I may have eternal life. In other gospels it depicts that both criminals are hurling abuses at Christ. Its commentated that the one began with abuse and after time realized who he was being crucified next to... "God". I have had years to come to this realization when one of the thieves came to this conclusion within hours to realize his depravity and his need for a Saviour.

The two thieves are examples for us of two different types of people in the world. The unbeliever who is blind to their their sin. Who hurls accusations at God with anger of why their life has turned out the way it has and for God to take them out of their dreadful situation ("Save yourself and us!")even though it was a consequence of their sinful life.

Than we have the other person who realizes that when they compare their life next to God's that they are a sinner in need of a Saviour and with only the sacrifice of the Saviour will they inherit eternal life.

Being that today is Good Friday, the day Christ was crucified, may we be reflective as we go into the Easter weekend that it wouldn't be just a time of eating chocolate bunnies and coloring hard boiled eggs BUT it would be a time of reflection of what Christ did for you so that He can say to you, "Truly I say to you, today you shall be with Me in Paradise."

Which thief are you?

A Table In the Wilderness

I was driving home on the freeway a few weeks ago and I was reflecting on my families current financial situation. I began to reflect and pray. I don't ask "why" anymore and I don't negotiate with Him either. But I began to preach truth to myself about who I know God to be.
I have been married 17 years and the majority of my marriage, 14 of the 17 years, we have been self-employed. Being self-employed you always have a sense and know where your provisions come from. More times than not you can see God's hand in bringing provision to you and your family.
Psalm 78 is a depiction of what God did for the Israelites in the desert in the book of Exodus. The psalmist was writing to use the history of Israel to show and teach the graciousness of God even in spite of their ancestors' rebellion and ingratitude.

Psalm 78:6-8

That the generation to come might know, even the children yet to be born,

That they may arise and tell them to their children,

That they should put their confidence in God

And not forget the works of God,

But keep His commandments,

And not be like their fathers,

A stubborn and rebellious generation,

A generation that did not prepare its heart

And whose spirit was not faithful to God.

v.10 They did not keep the covenant of God

And refused to walk in His law;

They forgot His deeds

And His miracles that He had shown them.

v.13-15 He divided the sea and caused them to pass through,

And He made the waters stand up like a heap.

Then He led them with the cloud by day

And all the night with a light of fire.

He split the rocks in the wilderness

And gave them abundant drink like the ocean depths.

v.17-19 Yet they still continued to sin against Him,

To rebel against the Most High in the desert.

And in their heart they put God to the test

By asking food according to their desire.

Then they spoke against God;

They said, "Can God prepare a table in the wilderness?

As my exit was nearing I came to this realization and it came over me with joy. I have seen God time and time and time again provide for me and my family....but why do I continue to doubt and question Him and ask Him to do it again? "Can YOU prepare a table in the wilderness?" Why would He stop after so many years of continual provision for us. I won't be like the Israelites who could see God's provision first hand in the desert by God providing manna from heaven, water from a rock and quail dropping in the midst of their camp and they continued to doubt and test Him by asking, "can YOU prepare a table in the wilderness?"

I will remember and believe what He has done in the past and He will continue to do so because that is who He is......

Psalm 78:35

And they remembered that God was their rock,

And the Most High their Redeemer.

My Hope is in Him

Since my last blog ...literally from the minute I pushed "enter" life has been a series of tests. A series of test that keep asking me repeatedly...do you believe what you preach? A series of waves that come and keep coming....wave after wave.

I grew up in Southern California and as a young girl learned to play and swim in the ocean. When you are closer to the shore you can jump over the waves or you can turn your back and let your back take the brunt of the wave. As you feel more confident you venture out farther into the ocean and realize that I can't jump nor turn my back to the wave but I need to make a "judgment call" and figure out what to do next so the impact of the wave doesn't hurt. You desperately try and analyze the situation and these are your choices....a) you can decide to either swim under the wave b) try to swim fast enough to get over the wave before it breaks or c) swim with the wave and ride it the shore. Most of the time you can be out in the ocean and be able to judge the waves and make accurate decisions BUT there are some times when your decision isn't so clear and you make a decision that hurts.....you swim and you swim to make it before the wave breaks but you're too late and you dive into the white water and the tumbling begins. The strength and the power of the wave hits you and it hits you hard.... to the point where it slams you into the sand and than you start to tumble and you don't know which way is up and before you know it another wave hits you before you can take another breath. Sometimes panic starts to set in and you wonder if you'll ever be able to get out of water and come to the top to take a breath ....a breath of relief from the waves that keep hitting you.

I think the Psalmist of Psalm 42 knew what it was like to swim in the ocean of life and know what it was like to try and swim fast enough to not get caught in the white water.

Psalm 42:5 -8

Why are you in despair, O my soul?

And why have you become disturbed within me?

Hope in God, for I shall again praise Him

For the help of His presence.

O my God, my soul is in despair within me;

Therefore I remember You from the land of Jordan

And the peaks of Hermon, from Mount Mizar.

Deep calls to deep at the sound of your waterfalls;

All your breakers and Your waves have rolled over me.

The Lord will command His lovingkindness in the daytime;

And His song will be with me in the night,

A prayer to the God of my life.

When you're out in the water of life.....You will swim out far enough to where the waves no longer break. And you'll be able to look back and see the waves (trials) of our life and see how God used those waves to make you more like our Saviour. He uses those waves to teach us about our sinful self and that we need Him. He wants us to put our hope in Him. When we're out there you realize that He was the one that gave you the strength and grace to weather the storm of the beating waves. I will repent of my doubtful ways when I question the waves.

"Hope in God, for I shall yet praise Him

The help of my countenance and my God." v.11